I am very happy and satisfied now :)

but the truth is, when I saw Bin at school...

I was thinking, when am I going to see Yell again lol

Am I going to see him now again anytime soon? lol

I was even like.... "FEW MORE PRAYERS THEN I WILL GET IT!!!!" lol!!! no. lol

I don't want him back at all, because I want God's best now and God's best will never leave me and will never be like him. I truly believe that I REALLY do deserve something WAYYY better than him now :)

I don't know, I still wonder how would it be like to have him as a friend again...

I don't have any bitterness in me anymore :)
Praise God.

I still do miss him but I kinda don't have that feeling that... I want him back wawhawhawhawah kinda thing.
I just really want to see how would it be like to have him back in my life again.

I never stopped praying.

I was just wondering how would our God talk would be right now. Now that I am different and... I don't know about him...

I still want to be his best friend again.

I want to invite them to our bible studies and fellowships and hang outs.

I know, I know he have beautiful friends and doesn't need us lol but... wala lang..............

I was just wondering.........

I still wonder what would it be like to be part of his life again.
How would it be like to have Yell in my life again, even if it's just as an apprentice.



I actually had a dream that I was with Alvin and we went to fellowship or something. Normal hang out day with friends, then I asked about what happened before...

I asked, why do they just have to drop me like that and do that to me...
He said that Yell and him planned it and he even told Yell that it's just so messed up to do that but Yell said...
It's the best thing he could do at that moment, the best thing for both of us.

I don't remember the other things he said but that's all I remembered then... in my dream I remembered Yell's text that I shouldn't think he never cared. When Yell said that to me, all I can think of was... "LIES!!!!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! GO AWAY!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Then after Alvin and I's conversation in my dream, I felt bad and eventually finally found my peace of mind...

It felt and looked so real, then I woke up -________________-"

PEACE OF MIND. GONE! HAHAHAHHAHAHA!!

Back to reality of trying to move and ignoring that stupid past that I just can't get rid of!!!!!

I moved on, it's just.... I don't know.... I'm still bothered by it lol -________________-"

Even if it's not going to change anything today... it's like.... I just really want to know the details..........

I wanna know WHAT IS! LOL!!! Popoy? Basha? HAHAHA

I know God knows what is in my heart and I know He totally hears all my prayers

I don't know...

Let God do what He wants to do to make things beautiful :)

I was just wondering.... :P