I'm still in love with you.

And this time it's stronger...
It's getting deeper...

I want to be real in here right now...

Just for now, I'll try not to control anything and maybe forget about the fact that I have to let you go.









For that entire year that I haven't seen your face
For that entire year that I haven't heard ANYTHING from you.
That entire year that I told myself that you died lol

I thought things would be different
I thought when I see you, I will forget everything about how I feel about you
I will forget about how you make me smile
I will forget how you make my heart skip a beat
and I will totally forget wanting to be with you all the time...

I thought, by this time, I'll be fine seeing you as my bestfriend, FOREVER.

but you know, this time, it's stronger...
and you know... I'm getting comfortable about the fact that I WILL FOREVER have you in my life.

The only thing that I am scared about is that, when I start to love you wayy too much again that God would take you away Himself cuz I can't let you go. I mean, I can... it's just so hard.

Hearing your voice, hearing those words, seeing you smile and having your scent on my clothes.
Everything.

You know what, I still have to let you go no matter how I feel about you.
Because I still love God more.

But you know... I want you to have the best...
but sometimes I wish.... it would be us.

That would be great ya know.
After 3 years, I am still madly in love with you.

We've gone through so much Ogalinie and still not a thing has changed.
I love you.

September 30, 2011

I just want to blog about our day today :')<3

So we went to chili's and ate "breakfast" at 12pm LOL

I woke up at 8am cuz he told me last night that we would probably hang tomorrow.
I was just thinking of me coming over to his house and chill like what we always do lol

I woke up early so I can be there early, but I was afraid to ask cuz he's probably sleeping lol
So I waited... till I fell asleep again! HAHAHA

I was holding my phone the whole time, then at 11am he finally texted me! and asked if I was awake and if I wanted to go have some breakfast with him at 12 :)

I don't know, this may not seem much but today... after the longest time...
after that LONGEST TIME!!!!! Of me trying to let him go, of me trying to move on, of me trying to forget about him, of me praying for our FREINDSHIP, of me praying for him to come back into my life as a FRIEND...

Since the day he cut me off his life on August 27, 2010.

I felt it, I saw it in his eyes.
Nothing has changed.

Thank You God for approving this day.
Thank You.

So you know we ate a chili's and stuff and he payed for my food and talked and stuff
and even if I know it's just a friendly day...
I would like to think that it's a date.

This day reminded me of the great relationship we both had.
That amazing connection I feel whenever I am with him
and those eyesssssss
that smileeeeeeee

I MISSED IT ALL

and you know it's happy to see that he have his purity ring back on and that conversation we had the night before about God :')

I am very glad<3

Also, when we went to his house...
I missed laying on his bed with him next to me.
You know, us not doing anything at all.
Just laying there and talking and try to take a nap :)

And before we part, I just had the best hug with Yell<3

I missed his arms around me.

And this was the longest hug I ever had with Yell since the very last time I saw him :')

This hug was longer than the hug he gave me when he saw me at Shepherd after we tried to have few months break on 2009.

That hug was special and his smile was special and the way he talked to me was special.

I missed my Daryl Ogalino.

but you know, just like what I've read at divine matchmaker.
"Casey only went as far as Joel leads"

So, I will not pursue him and STILL leave it all to GOD.

ALSO, Yell still needs to find and have an intimacy with the Lord again FIRST.

I will never stop praying for his soul.

I'm just very happy for today.
I really missed him.

Today really means a lot.
Thank You God. :')
Thank You for allowing me to see him today.

Now, back to business.