Impossible Dreams.

Can I still live with you guys?
You guys are still within me...
But are you REALLY just meant to be dreams...

I used to always, ALWAYS tell myself that...

Someday, I will live with my impossible dreams.
Because, dreams are meant to be lived in reality.

I will be a very VERY great performer.
I will have shows left and right.
I will be a SUPER LEGIT ARTIST
I will have my own store and everyone will want a piece of my creations.
and I will give my mom and siblings the life they deserve and I will spoil them for the rest of my days!

I am so determined to get there...
I sing everyday, I draw everyday and that's all I do.

I have everything planned out.
I thought I have, but I am not going anywhere.

I thought my determination can take me ANYWHERE.
But, I got nowhere...


I told myself, I will get a job,
save money for Art School
buy a scanner and art tablet
Draw, draw, draw
Post them online
Look for a publishing place and print my stuff all over and sell them......

but I can't even get to step one.
Now, step two got pushed back cuz... now, I need to find a place for myself and get myself a car and a license first before I can start...

I thought I ALWAYS knew what I wanted to be.
I just want to be the greatest performer and artist ya know.

I want to go REALLY far as an artist.

Well, yeah I'm juggling between a Science or Math Major.
'cuz, I know that being an artist is not going to be enough to feed my family AND spoil my momma and siblings in the future. I need a foundation.

I stopped it all before 'cuz I said I wanted to be a Dentist, 'cuz aside from REALLY good money, I always wanted to be one since I was a kid. I'm just not as passionate about it compared to my music and arts.
I tried to focus on academics and give it all up... but seems like I'm not going anywhere...

I'm scared to tell Yell that I am struggling with these 'cuz...
I'm struggling with everything already.
I'm too ugly....... :/

You know, without the money issues, job opportunity issues, time issues...
I will go all the way to be a REALLY great artist and a performer.

I wouldn't want to be called Dra. MaiQui Layaoen
Would be legit for sure! HAHA

But I would be VERY VERY VERY HAPPY and feel VERY ACCOMPLISHED.


When then world know me as MaiQui Layaoen
The singer and artist.
'cuz I know that's what I am really made for...

I know it's not some childish dream or whatever... 'cuz I've been doing it eversince.
It's just I want to be practical....
The only problem is... I don't know...
how can I be practical without giving up this dream or living my dream as a sideline....

This is me now...
Hi, I am MaiQui and I am a dreamer with broken dreams...

Jk, I still want that dreamer MaiQui that is not afraid to go out of her way to make it all happen.
It's just I don't know anymore............................
Are my dreams REALLY enough? :(