Monday, May 18, 2020

I kinda don't want things to be okay

I just want my stuff back.

My cute pill box, my expensive rose quartz roller and lunch box.

I am debating if I should wait for your call or I should just message you and say
"Hello, I would like to have my stuff back and never speak to you again"

I want to say the reasons but I don't think that you would ever listen.
You never paid attention.
You were so consumed by your own needs and wants.

I mean, it was good
We had some good times

But tbh I don't even know what your intentions are anymore

Each time I try to say how I feel you ALWAYS shut me out

I am tired
I just don't want to keep going anymore

I think we've been talking for 7 or 8 months now.

I need some clarity or something
If I would stay tell me why I should stay
Tell me a good reason to stay

If not, I will gladly take the exit.

________________________________________________________________

I don't even think that you ever notice how I am putting myself out there for you.

________________________________________________________________

I think tomorrow morning before I go to work or after work I would text you and say that I want my stuff back & that I don't want to do anything with you anymore.

I am tired.

I don't even want to explain.
There is no point explaining.

You won't even listen anyways.






Are you even thinking of me right now?

The way that I think of you.

I don't think that you even respect me.





I wanted things to work out.






I don't even know if its worth it.






It's like I am giving my 90% to you and you give 2% maybe 5% on a good day.
If I say this, I don't even think that you would listen.
Or even try to understand where I am coming from.




I just want a place that is safe.
You are not safe.


Tbh I felt that you just used me.
And I allowed it.







I don't know :/



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