Baka nga we are forcing it...

 Am I giving up?

Idk, tama ba na pagpatuloy pa napaglaban.

I mean, maybe I am overthinking or am I fighting what makes sense?

I mean he is right, if its really God's will its going to make sense in the end.
It's going to work out.

Is love & commitment really enough?

Pag natino na ko.
Pag I learned all the tools to cope na, I healed...
Tama ba na bumalik at ayusin lahat samin.


May point nga, nde kami nagkakaintindihan.
He doesn't feel encouraged or supported by me.

Nde fair sa kanya, ako I felt that with him... hanggang ngayon.
It makes sense why he got very tired...
Panay lang ako kuha... nde ko namamalayan.

It's nice to know that someone loves me that selflessly... :/

Pero would it be good for me to stay and keep him?
Would it be good for us?
Could we create a great future together?
Could we be a great life partner for each other?

We want each other to be good and to have the best... are we that for each other?

Ugh, why does everything have to be SO CALCULATED.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME.


Love okay andun madami yun.
Fun times din madami din yun.
Values namin pareho naman.
Commitment andun for sure.

Do we compliment each other?
I think so?

Madami naman tama.

Nde lang kami magkaintindihan.
Pero malaking bagay yun.

Yung pag ano-ano ko sa character niya at pagkausap ko sa kanya ng pabalang maayos ko yun.
Yung perception ko at pagiisip ko maayos ko yun.


Pero personality wise, okay ba kami.

hmmm, kmi naman ni Nikki ni isang common or whatever wala.
Magkaiba pa nga kami ng mundo, as in WALA pareho.
Pero bestfriend ko siya.
So, nde sa personality yun.

Naging magbestfriend kami ni Nikki kasi paulit-ulit namin pinili isa't isa.
Madali na ngayon kasi natutunan namin iforgive isa't isa ng mabilis.

Pero what lead to that choice?
Hmm sa una, wala lang nakikinig lang kami sa isa't isa.
Wala kami expectation sa isa't isa.
We just accepted each other as is.
Pareho lang namin tanggap isa't isa.

Siguro yun yun, mataas expectations namin sa spouse, sa buhay.
May expectation na napakataas.



I mean, is that bad?
Forever yun, dapat mataas standard.
Msyado ba kami naging idealistic sa pag-ibig.



Siguro.

Pero nde ba dapat natural lang ung connection.
Nde pinipilit.




Meron ba kami nun?
Feeling ko.
Pag kausap ko siya, pag nagkkwentuhan kami I feel connected to him.



Pero ung intindi.

kininginang intindi yan, pilit ko iniintindi.



Maybe we just need to spend more time together para masanay kami sa isa't isa.



Nde ko alam.

Sabi ni Nikki, matagal bago si Juju naging bestfriend niya.
Pati si Anna, si Carlos matagal din.


Lahat sila sinasabi na commitment lang talaga un.

Feeling ko naman may paraan.
Ayaw ko lang ipilit pag nde pwede.
Gusto ko din siya sumaya.
I want him to get what he needs in a relationship.
Ako din.

I mean tama naman na nasa season kami na ganito eh.
Kailangan ko to & kailangan din niya to.

Sana pag naayos ko na sarili ko, okay na.
Sana it makes sense in the end.
I mean it will pero sana andun siya sa huli pag nahanap ko na sarili ko.