If the Lord said yes...

Okay, let's think about this for a moment.

Let's say that Brian is GB and the Lord did wanted us to be each others companion to serve Him better.

Am I ready?
Can I accept it?
DO I REALLY WANT THIS LOL

Brian and I are so opposite lol
And he's so uncalled for
Very different from all the guys I've been with

Like, in a way that... He's not a musician, artist or whatever. His decisions are very different compared to my usuals.

His way of thinking is not like the guys I've ever been with at all

Well, he is very smart
But he doesn't have any pride at all

Well in my eyes.

'cuz me, ALWAYS. ALWAYS. ALWAYS. the guy I usually like have CRAY CRAY EGO and SUPER DUPER PRIDE CHICKEN.

Brian gets what he wants too and stuff but he is so humble about everything. VERY HUMBLE.

So uncalled for a guy that I would ever like.

He do acts kinda girly, which is a trait that my guy always have to come with LOL not my choice, just happens all the time lol

And he is very classy

Okay, the point is.
He is not the guy I usually go for

He is sensitive and very jealous.
Which I like lol

Okay, let s settle this right now.
DO I WANT THIS.
DO I REALLY WANT THIS.
WOULD I BE HAPPY IF THE LORD DECIDES TO GIVE THIS TO ME.

B, is very hardworking and dedicated to Jesus. So I can have my nice wedding lol

He is short tho
Lol

DO WE LOOK GOOD TOGETHER?

Well, I am happy having him around

He is mataray thats for sure.
Taray level higher than mine
I thought I was mataray, then this one proved me wrong LOL

AM I READY TO BE A PASTORS WIFE IF THIS HAPPENS.

DO I WANT TO LEARN SPANISH

LOL!!!!!!!

Okay, naiveness aside.

Honestly, I don't see a future with Brian just yet.
I like that he loves the Lord and all that Jesus stuff, but there are other things I need to consider.

SO WHY AM I FLIRTING AND ENCOURAGING THIS?

I don't know makes me feel good lol

AHHHHH

Heart is deceitful above all things who can understand it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOOOOORD I AM SCARED
I AM TERRIFIED

I AM REALLY REALLY SCARED.

I AM LIKING HIM MORE THAN I SHOULD
and the fact that I am thinking about these things IS HORRIBLE.

I SHOULDN'T CARE OR EVEN WANT TO THINK ABOUT THIS.

SHOULDN'T EVEN CROSS MY MIIIIIIIINNDD

& the fact that I prayed about it! AND TALKED TO JESUS ABOUT IT IS BAD.

I AMMMMMMM GETTING ATTACHHHHEDDD OH MAY GAD I DONT LIKE THIS I DONT LIKE THIS I DONT LIKE THISSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Okay Brian, you're gunna hate me for this but I will try to stop talking to you.

I swear, I am going to do it.

I am liking you more and more and more and I AM GETTING REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY SCARED.